The streets just got a little less safe

One of the things I’ve been meaning to do is learning how to drive. I could have how to a long ass time ago but you know how I like to procrastinate on everything,which isn’t necessarily a bad thing ’cause last year, I procrastina ed on committing suicide and I’m still alive bitches! At any rate, I now find myself in a situation were I have to learn how to drive, pass a driver’s license test that’s designed to make black folks who refuse to bribe the instructor, get a cheap car, all in a space of eight weeks.

I was under the impression that driving was easy, well it is, it’s just that I have terrible hand-eye co-ordination and as a result, the guy teaching me how to drive has gone from shouting at me every three second to downing a shot of vodka right before our lessons commences, no seriously. Time is running out, my test date is quickly approaching and I can’t seem to drive in reverse, or drive in a gear higher than two but I’m not giving up. And no matter how many times I might fail the test, I still won’t pay any bribe, no sucker, you will not see any of my money.

PS: The contrast between the horrors stories posted on the internet and the actual process of booking a Driver’s license test is startling, more proof that an average South African internet user is a lying whinger.